Sunday, April 15, 2012

Growing Pains

Did you have a favorite piece of clothing when you were a child, something that just made you happy when you put it on?  I did.  It was a pretty little shirt, all blue with ruffles on the sleeves and hem.  I loved wearing that shirt.  Then one day I put it on and it just didn’t fit quite right anymore.    It was hard to describe, maybe it was just a little snug in the arms, or it didn’t hang as gracefully as it once did.  I had outgrown it.  Of course, being human, I resisted this change.  I clung to the shirt for a while, ignoring my vague sense of discomfort.  But eventually I was forced to let it go.
Thistleglade has become like that shirt.  It’s still as beautiful as ever, filled with the power of Mother Nature.  It has not changed.  I have.  I can no long reconcile my belief that we desperately need the wild places of the world to stay wild with taking part of that wildness and making it mine.  I tried to ignore what was happening for a while, but my old worldview has become too uncomfortable to bear.  I must let it go and seek a new one.  Letting go is always so frightening.  I fear that only emptiness waits for me.  But life has taught me that whenever something leaves my life, something much more rich and complex enters. 

The goats and Sugar are gone, the trailer stands empty, and silence lives once more in Thistleglade.  We have found a new home in town.  It is a tiny, charming cottage sheltered by an immense oak tree.  It waits, like a blank canvas, to be painted with our hopes, dreams, living, and loving. 

Here’s to the magic of Growing Pains!

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